"WHY DON'T YOU GET SOME PROFESSIONAL PHOTOS TAKEN?" SHE SAID...
After being asked to submit an author profile photo for an upcoming literary event, I was told the photos I'd sent through weren't suitable. They were either, "too blurry, too small, not the right orientation, etc, etc. So, I thought what the heck, I'll get some professional ones done, that way I can always have some suitable photos available when l need them.
When l arrived at the studio, the so-called makeup artist proceeded to trowel a bucket-load of makeup on my face, (which included a pair of false eyelashes that looked more like a pair of sun awnings, than something that was meant to enhance your eyes). By the time she'd finished, I looked like a drag-queen.
Aaah, not quite the look I was going for. Not that I have anything against drag
queens, because I don't! But you have to admit, their makeup can be a little heavy handed. That being said, I was reassured that it'd look nothing like that in the actual photos.
But wait, there's more: "Whilst you're here, why don't we do a few fun shots as well," she said. (Sure, why not. It could be fun, I thought). Unfortunately, however, the actual author shots I had taken looked absolutely horrible, I kid you not! There wasn't one decent photo amongst them that I could actually use. SERIOUSLY! And although I'm pretty happy with the so-called "fun shots," they're about as useful as a concrete parachute, as far as an author profile photo. Aaah, back to square one.